by Carjamin Scott on October 25, 2020 at 5:50 p.m. EST

I have not met anyone who does not want to be successful. We all have this in common. So, why aren’t we all achieving the life of our dreams? The problem is two-fold: some of us have not determined what it will take to achieve success and others haven’t defined their own success. That’s why you need to be sure that you know how to reach your success goal and that you are creating your own success path. To make your dreams a reality, you need to believe that they can happen. You also need to be sure that you are staying in your own lane and not comparing yourself with others. This article will provide 8 ways to manifest the life of your dreams.

1. Practice the law of attraction.

In “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne, the law of attraction is described as a historical belief that an individual can have, do, and get everything they want, if they know how to apply ‘the secret.’ The secret is: anything that is going on in your mind is what you will be attracted to. The simplest way to understand this is, your level of thought will reflect your reality. Therefore, you must train your brain to live in abundance and create a favorable life. You need to dismiss ideas that are harmful to you or else you will attract it.

2. Count your blessings.

Let’s face it. It is hard to be grateful everyday. But when you choose to focus on what you’re grateful for instead of your problems, you are able to manifest what you want and dismiss what is troubling you. There is a song by Kanye West’s Sunday Service Choir called, “Count Your Blessings.” Whenever I am overwhelmed, I hum that song. It reminds me of what God has done. The next time something is bothering you, I challenge you to go to a mirror and look at your facial expression. Then turn that song on and notice if your expression changes. Use this as a visual example of how you can reprogram your brain to focus on the good rather than the bad.

3. Establish end goals.

Bad things happen. Embrace them, learn from the situation, and move on. Shirley Chisom, the first Black woman elected into Congress and the first Black woman Presidential nominee said, “You don’t make progress by standing on the sidelines whimpering and complaining. You make progress by implementing ideas.” What are your ideas? What are your end goals? I cannot imagine the strength Shirley Chisom used to face adversity and continue when things did not go her way. What keeps you going even when the going gets tough? Use your end goals to keep you on your life path.

4. Serve others without expectations.

The Bible teaches that you will be blessed when you give to others without expecting anything in return, “You will be blessed, although they cannot repay you,” Luke 14:14. A life of service is a life worth living. If you are in the position to choose between having or giving, choose to give. “One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered,” Proverbs 11:24-25. The lesson is: give what you can when you can. You will be rewarded for your service.

5. Set and enforce boundaries.

You cannot give from an empty cup. In Brene Brown’s Netflix special, “The Call to Courage” Brown says, “When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated.” Let’s be honest. Are we giving freely and without expectation when we allow others to abuse us? I get it. It’s hard to enforce boundaries, especially, if you seem to always be called upon to problem solve. Therefore, I suggest you start to enforce boundaries by creating a self care schedule. That way, you can designate time to restore yourself.

6. Take a risk and exercise your faith.

What’s a believer without faith? In the Netflix series, “Story of God,” Morgan Freeman said, “If you live a life of make believe your life isn’t worth anything until you do something that challenges your reality.” Are you living a full authentic life? When you think about the life of your dreams, are you playing it safe or are your dreaming big dreams? Are you focused on all the things that can go wrong? Or are you manifesting the circumstances that can make your dream become a reality? The best way to trust God is to test God. Always chose faith over fear. Dream big and go for what you want. Do not be afraid of making mistakes. There is success in our failure.

7. Bloom where you are planted.

Say this out loud: I am not waiting on the life of my dreams to happen. I am being prepared for it. Friends, you will not leave your current situation until you give it all you’ve got, right now. I know it’s hard, I have been there. Trust me. But, you have to power through and bloom where you are planted. If you’ve done all that you can; but, just can’t handle it any longer, you can give it to God. Pray this prayer: God, I am grateful for the situation I am in right now. I recognize why I am here and I have learned from it. I’ve done all I can do. I thank you Lord for delivering me from this situation. I thank you Lord for trusting me to do your will in this situation. I ask you Father to please let me move on from this. In Jesus name, Amen. When the time is right, you will be removed. Nothing lasts forever. Keep doing what you can so that you can leave when you want to leave and on your own terms.

8. Evaluate your inner circle.

Show me who you fly with and it’ll show me how high you will go. Evaluate your inner circle. Who are these people? Can you trust them. Do they truly care about you? Do they want what’s best for you? Do they take or give from you? Do they lift you up? Do they mentor you? Do you mentor them? If you have to question your relationship with them, let them go. Those people are taking up space. When you let them go, it’ll make room for new people to enter your life. You reflect the company you keep. Life is too short and you’ve got work to do. Don’t waste time with small minded people.

Thank you Dr. Brittany Hawkins for the photos. Follow Dr. Hawkins here.

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Carjamin Scott can be reached at hello@carjiescott.com and you can follow her on twitter @scottcarjie, instagram @carjiescott, and facebook at Dr. Carjie Scott.

by Carjamin Scott on October 16, 2019 at 1:30 p.m. CST

For a while now, I have been praying to God to remove me from a stagnant situation in my life. It seemed as though my prayers were unanswered because He kept me there for longer than I anticipated. And trust me, I did everything imaginable to break free and nothing happened. So, I decided to make the best of it and simply bloom where I was planted. After I finally began to enjoy that experience, it was taken from me. I was confused, heartbroken, and devastated. It took time to realize what God was doing but I continued to pray and trust in him. And now I know, I am walking into a new season.

Level up season has arrived and if there is something that you have been working toward or waiting on, I am here to let you know that you are not reading this post by accident.

1. You are starting to act on the plans that you made.

Do you remember those goals that you wrote down? Whatever stopped you from accomplishing those goals before cannot stop you any longer. Now, you are ready to do whatever it takes to make them come to fruition. You realize that everything you need to make it happen is right in front of you.

2. Your situation is shifting from the familiar to the unknown. 

You are now taking action to make your dreams a reality. The territory is uncharted and unfamiliar; but, you are willing to pave your own road. You are excited about the uncertainty and see it as an opportunity to do what you once thought was impossible.

3. Your relationships are changing and you begin to lose meaningless ones. 

New people are coming into your life who believe in you and your vision. They want to see you do well and want to support your cause. Old relationships are ending so that new relationships can arrive. You have learned from the past and have created boundaries to ensure that partnerships are mutual and fulfilling.

4. You start envisioning your new life.

You can finally see the end of the tunnel. At one time, you had no idea of how you were going to make things work. Now, you know what it is going to take to reach your goals and you are willing to put in the work to make it happen. You know what the end result will be and you are excited to imagine it come to life.

5. You are no longer afraid of anything. 

They say, fear is: false evidence appearing real. Your fear is gone and you have nothing to lose. You are ready to put yourself out there and do whatever it takes to get it done. They also say, insanity is: doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. You are ready to do something different to get something different.

6. You are more courageous than ever before and open to trying new things. 

You have a renewed sense of energy and are courageous enough to try new things. With your new relationships, you are going to new places and learning new things. Since your fear is gone, you do not mind making and learning from mistakes. You know that it is insane to continue doing things the way you used to. So, it is easy for you to change.

7. You own who you are and what you can accomplish. 

Everything you have learned from the past has prepared you for this moment. You know what you bring to the table; so, you are ready for a seat or you are prepared to buy your own table. You own exactly who you are and what you can do.

8. Your failures were put on display for others to see.

Your story will inspire others to level up. The world will watch your setbacks propel your comeback. Everyone will witness how everything you’ve gone through has strengthened you for this moment. You will finally understand why it all happened this way and you will share what you learned with others.

Thank you for modeling Dr. C! Check her out at fromchristysview.com.

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Carjamin Scott can be reached at carjamin.scott@gmail.com and you can follow her on twitter @scottcarjie, instagram @carjiescott, and facebook at Dr. Carjie Scott.

by Carjamin Scott on February 9, 2020 at 9:21 p.m. CST

When you aim high, failure is inevitable; only grit and resilience can combat it. Robert F. Kennedy said, “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve.” Our lowest moments can propel us forward. We must fail, it is just as important as success.

People with grit and resilience consistently get things done no matter the obstacles in their way. They are malleable and have the emotional strength to endure tough times. When faced with difficulty, they learn from it quickly and become stronger as a result of it. Improve your grit and resilience with these five steps to overcome failure.

1. Accept the failure.

Acceptance is the first step to recovery. It happened, now what? In order to move on, you have to own it. When you dismiss your failures, you repeat them. Take time to assess the situation, learn from it, and heal.

2. Forgive yourself and others.

Now is not the time to play the blame game. Stop blaming others for what happened and stop blaming yourself. Maya Angelou said, “It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself. Forgive everybody.” Bitterness and resentment are heavy; forgiveness is light. Let go of what happened to move forward.

3. Stop fighting.

It’s time to surrender. Psalm 110:1 reads, “Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies a footstool at your feet.” When you are in relationship with the Lord, he will use your enemies to improve your situation. Sometimes, we are our own worst enemy. Don’t be a footstool, you will hold yourself back. And there is no reason to fight enemies, it is a waste of time. True believers know that God will intercede. Love yourself and love others.

4. Practice and understand grace.

There are many definitions of grace. I define grace as acting in kindness, mercy, and compassion towards myself and others even when it isn’t deserved. It’s important to give and receive grace after a failure. Let grace restore you. Try it and watch what happens.

5. Do it for someone else.

If you can’t get back up after a failure, get back up for someone else. You never know who is watching you and who your story is impacting. So get up and keep going. Henry Ford said, “When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.”

Never underestimate the power of failure. Let it help you build confidence and toughness. Next time, you will try harder and dream bigger. You’ve got this!

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Carjamin Scott can be reached at carjamin.scott@gmail.com and you can follow her on twitter @scottcarjie, instagram @carjiescott.